[ honestly, he doesn't even know if it can. nott might kill it??? but. you know, he does know something...? ]
...You can tell from us, can't you? [ fuck those other mood squirrels, he's talking to THEIR mood squirrel ] You can feel it from him. You can feel it from me.
[ from the Mercenary, who has lived a horrible and harsh life... finding hope even in the simplest thing like rain. that despite the harshness and cruelty of war, he's still capable of it. still sees the world can bring upon good. he knows his life is nothing like Sora's. but that makes them two examples that are right here, alive and living.
[this is such a cute naib icon what the fuck? what the fuck.
"my heart...?"
the squirrel considers this, still overwhelmed as it looks between the two of them. it's there, beneath the overwhelming hopelessness here, and the fact the two of them are so different... it lends more credence to both of them. it isn't that they've just both led lives that gave them these answers, it's that theirs are so different and they've arrived here anyway. despite everything.
"i... i do," it says. "i don't want this."
the horde of squirrels screeches at this refusal, angry, despairing, and closes in. it overwhelms them not only with those feelings, but draws off whatever memories they can pick from the two of them. any time they've felt worse than any other, when they might have hurt in a way that it felt like they couldn't recover from, or felt like things might never improve-- or perhaps even just, very simply, the worst they've ever felt.
it feels real. it feels stifling. somewhere in the background, their own mood squirrel squeaks, pained.]
the squirrel makes its decision, and sora feels a little sense of relief and maybe some pride that they were able to choose. of course, that doesn't last for long before the horde starts to close in and overwhelm them with anger and despair.
it hits him quite suddenly. the hopelessness as he was sent away from his island and his world was destroyed, friends scattered across the worlds. the emptiness as donald and goofy left him behind and riku told him he was just the delivery boy, unworthy of the keyblade. the rage he felt at having his fate meddled with. the anger every time he clashed against ansem. then xemnas. then xehanort, repeatedly, over and over again. the despair of losing those closest to him over and over again. the way riku tried to tell him he wasn't worthless, the way he tried to protect both of them and they were still swallowed by darkness. the way xehanort took kairi and destroyed her before his eyes, split her heart into several pieces just to get a rise out of him.
all of them all at once is so much...but still. even so. there's the light that never goes out. there's always that small bit of hope, and it's when he hears the squirrel that he a.) grabs onto naib to make sure they don't get separated in case the horde attacks and b.) cups his other hand around the squirrel to shield it as best as he can.]
there's a brief relief from the Mercenary as well, that despite their siblings it still manages to decide for itself. good. good for you, little mood squirrel which they still do not know the name of.
but that suffocation of emotions, of those dreaded memories, is so so overwhelming. he thought the negativity was before but this? it's a whole other level of awful. the times he's had to abandon his comrades just to save his own life. despairing at that fact. and although Naib continued to fight, his friends had left the military behind and moved on, and Naib wondered what to do with himself. who was he? what use was he? why... why was he still even fighting? even when he was forced, having to pit him against his people and former comrades he had to leave. had to drop everything and leave that life behind. it had been the last straw.
it's harder to breathe. his chest heaving, gasping, throat tight as if truly suffocating. imagine he just dies here? but the weight of another on him shakes him out of his stupor. reminds him to breathe, to try. to grasp so desperately because he kept saying again and again... despite the cruelty of the world, a man like himself can still have hope.
he... he has to remember that. he has to. he grips back just as firmly to Sora, vision blurring and he tries to keep himself ground despite still suspending in space! but seriously, please enough. ]
[they cling to each other, despite everything. despite all of the suffering inflicted on them, the weight of that negativity. there is still a spark there, and their squirrel picks up on it too.
"stop it! stop!!"
it cries out-- and then there's a light emanating from it, pushing the horde back. it glows from within both of them, too, as they cling to the hope that they have, and the glow brightens. it surrounds them, shields them, so radiant they can't even hear the other squirrels, the despair fading. they are instead suffused with that feeling of hope, with its warmth.
and when it fades, they float alone among the stars once more.
"they are not gone forever, but... but they are gone for now. i think-- i think you have shown me what i needed to see.
[their squirrel is a godsend, maybe. he hears it crying it out he feels naib holding on, even if his eyes are trying to close just to block out the pain and make everything stop.
but then there's the light. it's warm and real and bright, and as the glow comes from all of them and protects them he takes a gasp of air to refocus, head shooting up to gaze around.
the horde's missing, but not forever. that's enough for now. he looks to naib to make sure he's still there, but he still doesn't quite let go. this squirrel is still on sora's shoulder but he watches the stars briefly as he thinks.]
...we need to go back. We have things to live for, too. And there's still a few things we have to take care of. But you can still come with us. You don't have to be alone.
[he vaguely wonders how either of them would have done if they'd been alone with this squirrel, actually, but. hm. he turns to naib again.]
[ it's shakey, but he's breathing normally now. well, as normally as someone can with all that trauma packed in tight! but Sora is a good anchor, that and the sensation brought upon their kind mood squirrel.
one eye is closed, focusing on recomposing, peeking with his other as Sora gives his reply and he nods a moment after. ]
...We can't stay here. We have people waiting on us. [ he thinks anyways? and the offer is still there but... something just tells him there's more to this. if the rest of its siblings are off doing... whatever they offered. what does that mean for this one? he focuses on the squirrel. ] Do you plan to try and help the worlds here?
[ whatever... other worlds there still are that's left here? of course, what could one little squirrel do against a hoard of despairing one??? but honestly, Naib has faith in it. it's come this far, hasn't it? and helped them both right now. he's pretty sure they would have been fucked otherwise. ]
..Mm. M'fine. [ he pulls at his hood over his head. please do not perceive his trauma. ]
[the squirrel looks torn. it does want to come, but... naib has a point, too. they will keep being a threat, and maybe it should stay...
it perks up, suddenly! it begins to glow, and...
with a little 'pop!' noise, suddenly there are two squirrels. instead of one gray one, there's a black squirrel on sora's shoulder, a white one perched on naib's head. the one with naib radiates warmth and happiness at him, soothingly.
i will leave something of myself behind here, two little voices echo. but these can come with you. we want to see from whence you came.
the stars begin to blur, and then streak. they're off again, with their new little companions-- back toward where they came from.
congrats, you did not take a perfectly good little squirrel and give it anxiety!]
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no subject
...You can tell from us, can't you? [ fuck those other mood squirrels, he's talking to THEIR mood squirrel ] You can feel it from him. You can feel it from me.
[ from the Mercenary, who has lived a horrible and harsh life... finding hope even in the simplest thing like rain. that despite the harshness and cruelty of war, he's still capable of it. still sees the world can bring upon good. he knows his life is nothing like Sora's. but that makes them two examples that are right here, alive and living.
yeah, he's ignoring the (hoard) ]
no subject
"my heart...?"
the squirrel considers this, still overwhelmed as it looks between the two of them. it's there, beneath the overwhelming hopelessness here, and the fact the two of them are so different... it lends more credence to both of them. it isn't that they've just both led lives that gave them these answers, it's that theirs are so different and they've arrived here anyway. despite everything.
"i... i do," it says. "i don't want this."
the horde of squirrels screeches at this refusal, angry, despairing, and closes in. it overwhelms them not only with those feelings, but draws off whatever memories they can pick from the two of them. any time they've felt worse than any other, when they might have hurt in a way that it felt like they couldn't recover from, or felt like things might never improve-- or perhaps even just, very simply, the worst they've ever felt.
it feels real. it feels stifling. somewhere in the background, their own mood squirrel squeaks, pained.]
no subject
the squirrel makes its decision, and sora feels a little sense of relief and maybe some pride that they were able to choose. of course, that doesn't last for long before the horde starts to close in and overwhelm them with anger and despair.
it hits him quite suddenly. the hopelessness as he was sent away from his island and his world was destroyed, friends scattered across the worlds. the emptiness as donald and goofy left him behind and riku told him he was just the delivery boy, unworthy of the keyblade. the rage he felt at having his fate meddled with. the anger every time he clashed against ansem. then xemnas. then xehanort, repeatedly, over and over again. the despair of losing those closest to him over and over again. the way riku tried to tell him he wasn't worthless, the way he tried to protect both of them and they were still swallowed by darkness. the way xehanort took kairi and destroyed her before his eyes, split her heart into several pieces just to get a rise out of him.
all of them all at once is so much...but still. even so. there's the light that never goes out. there's always that small bit of hope, and it's when he hears the squirrel that he a.) grabs onto naib to make sure they don't get separated in case the horde attacks and b.) cups his other hand around the squirrel to shield it as best as he can.]
Enough already! [leave! their squirrel! alone!]
no subject
there's a brief relief from the Mercenary as well, that despite their siblings it still manages to decide for itself. good. good for you, little mood squirrel which they still do not know the name of.
but that suffocation of emotions, of those dreaded memories, is so so overwhelming. he thought the negativity was before but this? it's a whole other level of awful. the times he's had to abandon his comrades just to save his own life. despairing at that fact. and although Naib continued to fight, his friends had left the military behind and moved on, and Naib wondered what to do with himself. who was he? what use was he? why... why was he still even fighting? even when he was forced, having to pit him against his people and former comrades he had to leave. had to drop everything and leave that life behind. it had been the last straw.
it's harder to breathe. his chest heaving, gasping, throat tight as if truly suffocating. imagine he just dies here? but the weight of another on him shakes him out of his stupor. reminds him to breathe, to try. to grasp so desperately because he kept saying again and again... despite the cruelty of the world, a man like himself can still have hope.
he... he has to remember that. he has to. he grips back just as firmly to Sora, vision blurring and he tries to keep himself ground despite still suspending in space! but seriously, please enough. ]
no subject
"stop it! stop!!"
it cries out-- and then there's a light emanating from it, pushing the horde back. it glows from within both of them, too, as they cling to the hope that they have, and the glow brightens. it surrounds them, shields them, so radiant they can't even hear the other squirrels, the despair fading. they are instead suffused with that feeling of hope, with its warmth.
and when it fades, they float alone among the stars once more.
"they are not gone forever, but... but they are gone for now. i think-- i think you have shown me what i needed to see.
do you... want to go back?"]
no subject
but then there's the light. it's warm and real and bright, and as the glow comes from all of them and protects them he takes a gasp of air to refocus, head shooting up to gaze around.
the horde's missing, but not forever. that's enough for now. he looks to naib to make sure he's still there, but he still doesn't quite let go. this squirrel is still on sora's shoulder but he watches the stars briefly as he thinks.]
...we need to go back. We have things to live for, too. And there's still a few things we have to take care of. But you can still come with us. You don't have to be alone.
[he vaguely wonders how either of them would have done if they'd been alone with this squirrel, actually, but. hm. he turns to naib again.]
...you're okay?
no subject
one eye is closed, focusing on recomposing, peeking with his other as Sora gives his reply and he nods a moment after. ]
...We can't stay here. We have people waiting on us. [ he thinks anyways? and the offer is still there but... something just tells him there's more to this. if the rest of its siblings are off doing... whatever they offered. what does that mean for this one? he focuses on the squirrel. ] Do you plan to try and help the worlds here?
[ whatever... other worlds there still are that's left here? of course, what could one little squirrel do against a hoard of despairing one??? but honestly, Naib has faith in it. it's come this far, hasn't it? and helped them both right now. he's pretty sure they would have been fucked otherwise. ]
..Mm. M'fine. [ he pulls at his hood over his head. please do not perceive his trauma. ]
no subject
it perks up, suddenly! it begins to glow, and...
with a little 'pop!' noise, suddenly there are two squirrels. instead of one gray one, there's a black squirrel on sora's shoulder, a white one perched on naib's head. the one with naib radiates warmth and happiness at him, soothingly.
i will leave something of myself behind here, two little voices echo. but these can come with you. we want to see from whence you came.
the stars begin to blur, and then streak. they're off again, with their new little companions-- back toward where they came from.
congrats, you did not take a perfectly good little squirrel and give it anxiety!]